Hoth: Blood and Ice

[Cynella Alde]

Cynella opted for this as a somewhat clandestine location for a more serious conversation. While privacy couldn't be ensured, she mainly wanted to be away from the noise of, well, everything else.

Much as she prided herself on a calm demeanor, one manner weighed heavily on her. "I'm glad you agreed to come," she said to Tethys upon arrival. "I did not want to burden you when so much else was going on."

[Tethys Carrack]

"Of course." Tethys opens a hand in reassurance. "It's no trouble."

Also, it had saved her from joining--or finding some excuse not to join--the social gathering Breela is apparently organizing with some Sith, which promises to be extremely awkward and not at all her scene.

Engineering is in much better shape now that the work crews Kat, Durasay, and Tethys (well, mostly Kat and Durasay) gathered this morning have finished with it. Hardly any ice lichen, and no wires hanging out of the paneling at all. Also, there are chairs. Tethys snags one and leans it against a console, not sitting quite yet.

"What's disturbing you, Cynella? Besides..." she half-shrugs, smiling wryly, "all of the obvious things, I mean."

[Cynella Alde]

Throughout her lifetime, there had been plenty of parties that Cynella had been glad not to attend. The worst was when she had heard about some sort of Burn Book...

The use of her first name struck her as a little odd, not that she had ever asked Tethys to do otherwise. That wasn't the nature of their relationship... though things were different with Kat. Paladins, perhaps?

"Oh, yes, my concerns," she said with an awkward chuckle. "Besides the obvious. Well, it's actually partially related to the obvious, or rather, it had grown since something obvious had come to my attention."

Oh what would Mother say seeing me blubbering away like this?

Cynella took a deep breath and straightened up her posture. "The trial, which you expertly prosecuted, I must say, has been weighing on my mind. On Kuat, and much of the galaxy, there is high praise for the Jedi, particularly the Masters." Her self-rallied spirit waned, though not to the same extent as before. "It's not just this Layne Hoshin. I've been concerned about... the training process."

[Tethys Carrack]

Perhaps the unwonted casualness was a result of being trapped on an ice base for weeks in very informal conditions! Or possibly just player forgetfulness. Only the Force knows for sure.

"Oh." Tethys tilts her head back a little, inhales and exhales slowly and deliberately, looking into the middle distance for a moment.

She gives Cynella a grave nod. "If I had to guess, I suppose you mean--why does the Jedi Order sometimes fail. How is it possible for a Jedi to fall into darkness." She spreads her hands palm-up. "Something on those lines?"

[Cynella Alde]

It was not so much informality but the lack of the usage of Rhia! She so adored Tethys, after all, and so did her children. Auntie Tethys? Uncle Keyhote? Life was strange in the galaxy.

"Somewhat," Cynella said. "Well, we all struggle. But how does someone become the rank of Master and still have such... behavior?" Or, stars forbid, the Council? Once someone was a Master, they surely had a shot at being on the Council and being in charge of everything. "It'd be like a General or an Admiral acting thusly."

She sighed. "I obviously trust in your judgment though. Let that never come to question."

[Tethys Carrack]

"Well, a General or an Admiral is not quite the same. We're not actually a military order, although some people mistake us for one. Members of the Council decide which Jedi will join their number, and those Masters do have some greater authority, but the Order isn't very particular about ranks and titles. Any Jedi who has been trusted to train an apprentice, and seen that apprentice pass their trials, is technically vested with the title of Master." With a low chuckle, she adds, "Since Byron is a full Jedi now, I could even go about calling myself 'Jedi Master Carrack,' if I wanted to do so. I usually find it's much more practical not to."

She lifts one shoulder, half-shrugging that away.

"But Layne is... Mn. Layne's always been unusual." Tethys sighs. "You know she defected from the Sith Order, I think? The Jedi rarely turn away Sith who sincerely want to leave. It would... defeat the purpose, to be too mistrustful. It's hard to come back once you've drowned in the dark energies they play with. Without someone who trusts you, offers you a hand," she gestures with one of her own, "it becomes even more difficult. I don't know all of Layne's story, only that she was still just an apprentice when she left the Sith--but I think that is the crux of the matter, actually. Perhaps there are parts of herself she never trusted the Jedi with, in all this time."

[Cynella Alde]

"Right, right, the comparison is not perfect in the least." Cynella didn't sound entirely convinced. After all, there were so many Jedi involved with military affairs. But it was far from her place to contest the intended purpose of the Jedi Order.

In her own way of brushing it off, she smiled. "I doubt my children would enjoy calling you Master Tethys anyways." The smile wavered. "You don't mind if they call you Auntie, do you? Susette, well, she likens everyone to be family." Even Susette, an infant, came under Cynella's scrutiny from time to time.

"Ah, yes, I had heard as much from Darth Baras." Cynella pursed her lips as she thought about the Dark Side. Though she possessed no particular connection to the Force, that didn't stop her from forming an opinion. "So do you think it's her exposure to this that has made her... act this way? It's been years since I glimpsed her from Alderaan. It's hard to fathom the Dark Side forcing someone to act this way."

Cynella gripped onto her coat. "I wonder if it's possible to, well, sever this connection. It might be the best for some people." And she wasn't talking about Layne necessarily.

[Tethys Carrack]

"No, not at all. 'Master' would be quite uncomfortable, and I like 'Auntie.'" A smile softens the planes of Tethys's face. "You know I don't have any brothers or sisters by blood. I am very happy to take up as much 'aunt' as I can in other ways." Alderaan and Bankor, in particular, are home to a non-insignificant number of small children with an 'Auntie Tethys' popping in and out of their lives.

"Hm." Her brows arch a bit. "I'm curious what Darth Baras had to say about it--though I would not put too much personal stock in his opinion. Anything he has to say about this may be clouded by the Dark Side's hold on his mind, and by his own schemes." She leans her hip against the nearby console, her body language open even as Cynella's becomes slightly more closed. "The dark side of the Force isn't exactly like radiation or a pathogen. It's the other side of the potential we all carry within us. And so it doesn't touch you just because you're exposed, you must choose to call on it, make it part of you. But someone like Layne... a young person in the position she once was, who is pushed to make that choice under pressure, perhaps before she was old and wise enough to even understand it..."

Tethys sighs, half-shrugging and opening a hand. "It's not fair, like many things in the Sith Empire. But no matter how it starts, once you've let the Dark Side grip you close, it's hard to free yourself completely. Harder if you never really trust the people trying to help you, or accept their help fully." She shakes her head a bit. "There are a few mentions in the Archives of people whose connection to the Force seems to have been broken, but no one really knows how or why, or whether it was permanent. If it was that simple, things would be... well, simpler. I'm quite sure some people would choose it readily."

[Cynella Alde]

"I wasn't entirely sure how the Jedi felt about it. Then again, Kat has kept close ties to House Ulgo." Cynella smiled faintly. "I was led to believe Jedi lived as hermits on distant planets."

Cynella shrugged. "Oh he exuded devious mannerisms, much as one could expect. He labeled this Layne individual as a dog which bit the hand which fed her. It was very much par for the course, though if I had to guess, he took some pleasure in watching her struggle. He doesn't take me as the man who permits one to just leave his service."

The talk on how one became steeped in such darkness was of far greater concern than a mysteriously agile-for-his-size man. Its pervasiveness certainly disturbed her, as Tethys could likely see from the grave expression. "That reminds me of an addiction. But rather than outside stimuli, it seems to come from within. Well, in those particularly attuned to this Force."

There wasn't any point in delaying it any further. "It's a bit early to figure if any of my children are sensitive to it. My wife and I are not, as you can probably tell, but I've heard that rarely matters." She pressed her lips together. "But if one does not train, then do such talents naturally wane?"

[Tethys Carrack]

"I expect he did enjoy it, yes," Tethys says with some distaste, thinking of what Luth has told her about the man.

"... Oh." So that's what has Rhia so worried. Or part of her worries, at least. It isn't as if there aren't plenty of other things to worry about right now, too.

"Your girls. It's still early, yes. And... no one really knows why some people feel a stronger pull to it than others do." Her gaze softens, becoming sympathetic. "It doesn't, though. Go away on its own. That's why the Order puts so many resources into finding and teaching children. Why Kat and the others began their work with the Paladins, too. If the power is there, it's there, and it will grow. Perhaps slowly, sometimes fast, but in any case it can't be locked away forever."

[Cynella Alde]

Cynella folded her hands over her lap and stood up straight, just as she had learned when hearing an important lessons. Though natural to her, it had been some time since she had slipped back into this behavior. Such served as structural support as her fears became more substantiated by Tethys' explanation.

By the end of it, she mustered up the smile practiced ten thousand times. "So it would appear that training would dictate their future with the Force. That is, if they are pulled into it down the line."

Her brows narrowed. After seconds of deliberation, she shook her head, determined to be forthright. "I doubt it comes as a surprise that I want to arrange the best future for my children. Is there a way to, say, select tutors or... Avoid others?" She let out some nervous energy in the form of laughter. "I've had quite some time to wonder about this."

[Tethys Carrack]

"Yes, I see now that this has been troubling you for some time," Tethys says softly. "I'm sorry I didn't realize sooner."

It makes sense, though. The little Alde children have been provided with perfect nutrition, meticulously vetted caregivers and tutors, an optimal exercise and enrichment regimen. Mathematically perfect Kuati classical music in the womb, too, probably, and an ideal academic curriculum planned out in advance through the post-secondary level. And yet the Force is a wild factor no one can really plan around.

She smiles... reassuringly, she hopes, but at least sympathetically. "Training makes a difference, yes. So do the other influences in a young Jedi's life. Kind friends and teachers, a family who teaches her to be thoughtful and considerate of others and to discern between helping and harming. Chances to experience the good in the galaxy, and in other people. There are so many pieces that go into giving any person the confidence to set aside fear and choose what's right, and the wisdom to decide what that is." She opens a hand, extending it palm-up toward Cynella. "In training, the Order often respects the advice of Jedi who know a child well, or know the child's parents. But it's all so much more complicated than being taught to play music, or solve equations." Her lips quirk a little more at that. "Learning to use the Force is just learning to be a person, in the Force. Every part of our lives is part of the lesson."

[Cynella Alde]

"Are you a mind reader, Tethys?" Cynella asked with a forced laugh. One could never be so sure with a Jedi. "Anyways, we've all been busy. You don't need to look after me."

For all her efforts, Cynella could only hope that the lessons would stick. She too had had the benefit of a wonderful upbringing. Much of it had stuck, but the one sorely lacking had been her academics. Never in her life would she be able to explain how a starship even worked. Selling one, though, was easy!

"So it is a question of being an upstanding person," Cynella said, still unsure. "But in a way, the corruptive side of the Force leads people to be, well, the very opposite." She mulled over her children, quite obviously when she looked at three fingers. "But who's to say right now if any of them will be a part of that life."

Cynella opened her mouth, pulled back that question, then smiled. "I assume you have no regrets given your sensitivity to the Force."

[Tethys Carrack]

"Not usually, no," Tethys says with a wry smile, in response to the question about mind reading. "I try to be a better observer than it seems I have been, though."

"Mn... it leads both ways. The Force can reflect--magnify--the best or the worst impulses in any person." She half-shrugs, lifting a hand palm-up. "I hope that the ways I learned from the Jedi have had a good effect on who I've become. But I can't ask the version of me who never became sensitive to the Force--she doesn't exist, so I can't know what her life would be like." Her brows arch inquisitively. "Was that what you mean? Do I regret becoming a Jedi?'

[Cynella Alde]

Cynella raised a brow. "Would you lend that to your Jedi techniques or, uh, lay person techniques?" she asked, again with nervous giggling.

"Hm, no, I did mean a life where the path of the Jedi was never available to you." Cynella shrugged lightly. "But yes, was a silly question to begin with. I can't imagine you weighing yourself down with that sort of hypothetical. The future, though, well... I hope you can't blame me for thinking on that."

[Tethys Carrack]

"To be honest? I don't always think about where one ends and the other begins," Tethys admits, perhaps a little bit sheepishly. "It's like... hm. Do you experience a cup of kaff with your sense of smell, or taste? It's both, often anyway."

She sighs, tilting her head back and closing her eyes for a moment. "I think we are all dwelling on the future a great deal these days. It is quite natural, given... everything."

[Cynella Alde]

Cynella pursed her lip then nodded. "Yes, it would be difficult to know once steeped in it. Perhaps we will never be able to analyze it thoroughly." If only they knew that numerical statistics could indeed be applied to their abilities.

"It has become a frightening future on such short notice. I'd always thought of war but against some mysterious threat?" There were, of course, the obvious implications on her children's lives. Live in a galaxy suffering through loss... Perhaps even inheriting the bloodshed and the duty to end it.

[Tethys Carrack]

Tethys, likewise, is serenely unaware that her entire person might be reduced to numbers on a list. Or midichlorians. Fortunately.

"There are more mysterious threats out there at any time than you or I can even imagine. But... on this scale?" She shakes her head, frowning. "And with so little warning." She catches Cynella's eyes with her own and, in a calm tone, tries to set her own worries aside and reassure her friend. "If anywhere is safe at the moment, it will be Alderaan."

[Cynella Alde]

"But how safe could Alderaan stay? Kuat?" Cynella locked eyes with the Jedi, doing her best to remain calm instead of allowing fear to overtake her completely. "The Outer Rim falls first, assuredly, which would be a tragedy. Thereafter, the Core Worlds, all the way to Coruscant." She pressed her lips together. "And even that planet isn't entirely safe."

Cynella rolled back her shoulders and kept her chin high. "Nothing to do but press onward, yes?"

[Tethys Carrack]

"Yes," Tethys agrees, the word half a sigh. "One oar stroke after another. There's no other way."

She hesitates for a moment, thinking. "I have... I think I would sense it if something happened to Glade." Cynella might have met Tethys's young Ithorian apprentice, if only briefly. "She's on Alderaan now, or was when we left for Hoth. I've... I feel that she's still all right, for now. That isn't much to go on, I know. But it is not nothing."

[Cynella Alde]

"The galaxy is cruel if you can sense a student and I have no such connection to my own children," Cynella said with a rueful smile. "Maybe it's for the best this way. Could you imagine a galaxy where everyone had these abilities?"

She shook her head. "It's not a particularly useful thought exercise."

[Tethys Carrack]

"I'm not sure what that would be like, if everyone were so connected." Although, actually, it's not the first time Tethys has wondered this, in idle moments. "It's an advantage sometimes, but a great responsibility as well. As you've seen, here." She shrugs one shoulder. "Of course, I could say that about many other things too. Advantages like wealth, for example, or holding the rank of Prince or Princess." Her smile is gentle, a bit lighter in mood than a moment ago.

[Cynella Alde]

Cynella frowned, not due to offense but rather uncertainty. "Over my time on Alderaan, I have grown more accustomed to sharing wealth. It would seem that my homeworld is not so kind to the lower classes." Trickle down economics didn't work... How ghastly.

"And yet, nobility seems even more entrenched here. The navy has shown me that there is a need for leadership. Unlike my titles, it is not hereditary but rather seniority. Yes, there's a bit of merit included but..."